Received a late subpoena to be a witness for an upcoming trial. I already gave testimony, so, what the hell do they want from me now? …The case? Some psycho tries to kill his girlfriend is all. In my driveway. Its about eight in the evening. I’m in the barn at Acton, helping Leo fail some class. We have a pounding at our bridge door. Now, no one uses that door. Well, the N.A.T. Team does, but no friends. I grab a flashlight since no porch light there. A wild eyed woman’s face is illuminated in my lamp’s beam. I say, “Yes”? She informs me her old man just tried to kill her. I nod my head, then ask her in. As she blurts out her story to Pat, I wonder where Mr. Wonderful is right now. I didn’t have to ask her. I hear an SUV roaring under the bridge, heading towards the Danny Devito stairs. Opening the upstairs door, I hit the stair lights, just in time to see the vehicle crash into my custom chicken coop…Since it had just rained, the dirt road was not the road to speed on. This man is now wedged into the vehicle by the deck railings. He ends up climbing out of a rear side window. A big skin head with lots of tattoos. He starts jumping up and down on the roof, then, switches to some Karate kicks to the doors and windows once he fell off. He then starts to come up the steel stairs with a gun in his hand. I have my .12 gauge behind my back. I say, “Hey Bub, hand over that gun and we’ll talk”! He stops, stares at me, then hands it over. SO far, so good. I notice he’s dripping blood from his left hand. From beating on the car most likely. While I take care of his wound, I’m talking to this obviously drugged out guy to calm him down. I look past him through the barns big picture window. Cop car after cop car are coming up the road from the highway. Guess where. By the time the cops take this guy away, they Tazzered him TWICE! Oh man, this guy on the first go around, just didn’t get the message. When the Sheriff hit him the second time on wet ground, this guy danced like an out of control meat puppet, then, did a Curley of the Three Stooges break dance on the dirt drive…Note: When tazzered it seems you lose control of all bowel functions…