I’m working at a Witch’s shop off Hollywood blvd. just past Vine. I pretend to believe in this crap to placate the shop owner as I fix her credit card machine. I end up invited to a big Witchs and Warlock Halloween party in about two weeks at her house. As she gave me the address, I laughed out loud. I knew the house alright. It was Errol Flynn’s old place on Flynn Ranch Road. I have the old forties fridge out of it in the blue barn, right now. Anyhow, I end up at Stan Winstons ‘Creature Factory’ near the Van Nuys airport industrial complex, later on in the day. Stan used me on side jobs all the time. He also fired me four or five times over twenty years. Another story for another time. One of his techs of special effects showed me this little item he had been working on for a joke. In short, an enormous, inflateable penis. It inflated by a mini hand pump you hid in your pocket. A small plastic tube fed it, run past your nuts…It took quite the whinning and crying, plus, some trade items, to get this weiner out for a test run Halloween night. I end up having to take the guy from Stan’s with me, to see how it worked…It’s the big night. I wear boxer shorts with my unit taped in place to spring out correctly. I already knew the house, so, positoned us next to the big stone and brick fireplace in the big living room of the forties era house. Finally, it’s almost Midnight. The Witching hour. I had on loose sweat pants, but still, this big dick had chafed the inside of my legs and I was ready to dump it hours before…The head Witch brings about fifty of her inner circle with candles in front of her, sitting down, the rest of the gang, all dressed in various masks and costumes, crowd behind. She does some latin stuff, then says, “I feel your presence, dark one. Let your presence be known!” It was now or never, I slid next to her since she’s in front of the fire, pretend to be in sort of a trance, then, drop my pants and pump like crazy on the hand pump. OH MAN! The gay guys went WILD!!! The viens and the throbing, swelling red head on this sixteen inch monster made it seem to have a life of its own. Sadly, the magic moment lasted about ten seconds. This Witch, rips it off me and starts beating me over the head with it….We ran for our lives, sans the demon dick…
